Social Skills Training

In spite of their many impressive intellectual and academic accomplishments, there are a number Michigan Tech students who feel socially awkward and inept. Many MTU students feel anxious and insecure about speaking in public, approaching attractive strangers and initiating a conversation, asking a person in their class out for coffee or for a date, "working a room" and actively mingling at parties or social gatherings, or simply holding up their end of an active conversation.

Because they were so absorbed in their intellectual fields of interest, a good number of present Tech students were not interested in doing those things that most high school students do.

There are some MTU students who never dated in high school, never went to high school parties, got involved in high school extracurricular activities, or "goofed around" with that many friends. They were too interested learning chemistry, computers or calculus to care about getting involved in those typical high school activities that provide most people the experiential foundation of their adult social skills.

Arriving in Houghton, many new Tech students suddenly find themselves on their own for the first time in their lives, wanting to make friends, suddenly wanting to start dating, and suddenly wanting to get involved socially to an extent they never wanted to before. At the same time, they mght find themselves in a dorm room sharing space with a stranger whose habits or hours don't quite mesh with theirs. They may feel too socially anxious to initiate a reasonable discussion and resolution of these differences. On the other hand, they may have been so used to doing things on their own they might not even notice they are infringing on their roomate's schedule, territory or sense of order until the roomate is already infuriated and out for revenge or loudly complaining to the RA.

Suddenly these particular Tech students discover that they lack the social skills other students, it seems, "naturally" possess. Comparing themselves with those Tech students who did lead very full social lives while in high school and who now have fully developed social skills and social confidence, these very bright but socially self-isolated Tech students suddenly feel out of place and unable to catch up, make new friends or get up the nerve to ask that attractive classmate out for lunch. They find themselves in roomate conflicts that neither make sense to them or seem resolvable.

This is the point at which Counseling Services can prove very useful. Either in individual counseling or through various educational groups, Tech students coming in to Counseling Services have "made up for lost time." In counseling, many Tech students have developed or expanded their social skills in areas such as:

Asserting oneself in conflicted situations, detecting and countering social and emotional manipulation, and moving conflict towards negotiation and resolution

Making an appointment at Counseling Services is easy and is an effective way to begin learning those social skills you didn't pick up on in high school or at some other time in your life. Why needlessly sit around in your room thinking about going out there, meeting new people and having fun when you can learn the social skills you need to learn to get out there and do it now?